A space industry grade satellite controller from thirty years ago with a joystick and a 1990's Dell Desktop computer. The computer has a suspicious flap of red skin draped over it. THe caption reads "Our NEW/old satellite remote! complete with joysick! Worn and running Windows 2000 but we can work with it."

Satellite Remote

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Most folks in this pre-magnepulsatian era hear “pirate tv” and think of little descrambler cards smuggled in from Canada, inserted into a receiver and, with some careful aiming of the dish, allowing entertainment streams hitherto only available by subscription for free. To be sure we’ve been to Canada and we are a well aware of these little cards. Our deck has several installed.

But our apparatus doesn’t just receive signals from space, it can be used to control NOT THE DISH ON THE GROUND, but the satellite in space! Yes, boys and girls, it doesn’t just catch CNN newscasters picking their noses on camera because they haven’t gone live yet, it doesn’t just get us HBO for free, it puts us in 2-way communication with our own satellite! Notice the pitch and yaw controls.
A space industry grade satellite controller from thirty years ago with a joystick and a 1990's Dell Desktop computer. The computer has a suspicious flap of red skin draped over it. THe caption reads "Our NEW/old satellite remote! complete with joysick! Worn and running Windows 2000 but we can work with it."
A space agency grade satellite controller

I have acquired these worn but functioning aerospace devices while driving under the influence of Spacerex (DUI Spacerex). This is a possession of sorts which the Post-Apocalytes initiate and I observe from space. Since Spatz Curtis was neutralized, I have become their new avatar. We recently uncovered a prototype avatar skullcap which Spatz used to achieve his own Spacerex avatar status. It is somewhat mysterious that he never mentioned this to me or any of the cadre before.

Rex Flynder, the primary human survivor of the apocalypse, has been working through me, cutting through fences, infiltrating military bases and synchrotron facilities with an accuracy only direct access to future surveillance camera footage and security logs can afford. We’ve been rebuilding the Spacerex toolbox for big new ideas for saving the world from the morbid influence of Fat Baby Foot LTD and other future white collar crime syndicates bent on changing the course of history for their own evil ends.

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